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- UPC music series brings South Carolina singer to UNT
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- Festival Review: Austin City Limits
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Future of currency should make no cents
The United States loves to rag on Canada. We’re not sure if this is due to some kind of twisted geopolitical sibling rivalry, or simply because Canadians are far too polite to retaliate.
Either way, we ought to watch our mouths, because Canada outpaced the U.S. on national progress this week by eliminating the penny from their currency.
“Eliminate” might sound harsh, but this just means Canadian mints will no longer produce the humble copper coins — it’s not like they’re going to ransack every change jar in the country.
To make things easier, retail stores in Canada will now round their prices to the nearest nickel, while online purchases using credit cards and other electronic payment systems will remain unchanged.
Why are we so excited about this? Because pennies, whether they’re sporting Abe Lincoln or the Queen of England on the front are a waste of time, money, and pocket space. It’s time we joined the future of money, and the first step is kicking our penny habit for good.
In the states, it costs more than two cents to mint a single penny, and it’s not like we ever get the chance to use them anyway.
Vending machines don’t usually accept them, you can’t put them in most parking meters, and if you try to tip with them at a restaurant, you’ll probably get beaten up in the parking lot.
In short, the penny is nothing short of a national nightmare, a constant reminder of inflation and the non-existence of one-cent candy in today’s America. It’s high time we woke up to a penniless world, and not the unemployed kind, either.
Although Canada is outpacing the U.S. on the penny problem, it’s not alone.
Australia, Brazil, Britain, Finland, New Zealand, Norway and Switzerland have also seen the light and eliminated their currency’s equivalent to the penny, and everything’s still coming up roses over there as far as we can tell.
Killing the penny won’t make prices go up, and will save the country millions in time and money every year. President Lincoln’s mug will still grace the five dollar bill, so we’ve got nothing to lose.
In fact, the only people who might suffer from such a decision are the fine folks who own all of the CoinStar machines at the grocery store, and we think they’ll survive the disappearance of these copper boondoggles too.
It’s time to take the gloves off on this thing, so we suggest you mail your worthless penny collections to President Obama until he takes the hint.
And you know what? We’re not too fond of nickels either.