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London broils, says ‘neigh’ to mystery meat
Most of continental Europe is currently flipping a lid over the recent revelation that a considerable amount of prepared meat products in Britain, Ireland, Italy and Spain might contain horsemeat.
The food giant Nestlé is apparently to blame after using shady meat suppliers for some of their popular products like frozen lasagna, and their testers admitted finding “traces” of horse DNA in several products before the company pulled them from the shelves.
They certainly broke a leg with this scandal, but is it really time to take Nestlé out behind the barn and put it out of its misery?
Let’s not all jump on the corporation at once. Keep in mind that we’re talking about a company that also brings us the wonders of Kit Kat bars, so choose your words wisely.
Besides, the U.S. branch of Nestlé assured customers this week that their suppliers don’t import products from any countries where horsemeat was discovered, so the impression so far is that American palates have avoided horsey flavors.
But really, are we that concerned? Considering what prepared food manufacturers do to their meat before it goes into, say, a canned tamale, it’s not like we have any room to complain. We’re pretty sure that processed meat would end up pretty gross even if you started with a $50 steak, which is why we don’t think about it very hard.
Seriously, if you’re concerned about finding horsemeat in your frozen lasagna, go look at how chicken nuggets and hot dogs are made. YouTube will make a vegetarian out of you.
If you put horsemeat in a lineup alongside Taco Bell’s ground beef and the shredded chicken bits from the center of a budget frozen enchilada dinner from Wal-Mart, we’re fairly confident that most of you couldn’t pick it out, or possibly even tell the difference between the chicken and beef.
According to the French, who know a thing or two about cooking the greatest foods in the world, horsemeat is a flavorful and versatile option for everything from stew to burgers to roast. That’s right: horse roast.
The meat has more protein and lower fat than beef, and apparently tastes sweeter than most red meat.
Horse is consumed in France, China, Germany, Belgium, Scotland and many more. These countries clearly aren’t primitive, they’re just less inclined to drown their meaty cravings in something like a Doritos Locos taco.
Maybe we should take a cue from the French and give this new culinary sensation a shot. Just don’t ask us to eat frozen lasagna.